One thing military deployment is bound to teach you is if "you're a pussy or not." You are taken away from everything you know and the comforts of home and now that is as basic as it gets. Sure, we do not have it as hard as the Spartan Warriors from the past, but when you have been used to the luxuries of living then placed into the grassroots of survival, it can be very trying. Heck, sometimes deployment is the most discipline an individual will ever have at their fingertips. You are held accountable by your squad leader, platoon Sgt., platoon leader, and even your friends if you have the right people around you. However, it can be a time where you find yourself missing home and those you love, which creates a downward spiral due to the many factors that cannot be controlled.
One thing I have already done at home but found more time to do on deployment is read. I read so many books on deployment I would like to think my I.Q. has increased a few more points. Out of
all the books I read, I ran across a book by Navy Seal Jocko Willink called "Extreme Ownership." What I acquired from that book is that no matter what factors I cannot control, I can still play a part to minimize what I cannot control. Let me give you an example. You have a friend who is making poor decisions. Now your friend is not your responsibility in what they do or how they act but what if you took on the responsibility and extreme ownership of that friend to help them. In helping them without condemnation or patronizing but to lead them to a place of wisdom.
I heard something years ago and did not fully understand what it meant until recently. "If your circle includes five successful people, You will be the sixth." If you choose to lead by example your friends will pick up on your disciplines. People want a leader in their life. Someone they can turn to for advice, real friendship, trustworthiness, and everything else good in life. In most cases, this is how you help those friends who are making poor decisions.
BE THAT PERSON TO THOSE YOU LOVE AND CARE ABOUT
Being away on deployment is hard when your family is everything good in your life. After reading "Extreme Ownership," I decided to make some changes. I was going to hold myself accountable in the most extreme way possible. I started looking at everything in my life as it being my fault and responsibility to ensure my as well as other's success. Of course, you cannot make a horse drink but you can make sure that the water you are offering looks like the last drop in the middle of the desert. I am not telling you to fake it until you make it. What I am saying is to be genuine, loving, kind, and understanding for others including yourself. Guide those you love without breaking their spirit. If you make moves in life with the understanding that you could be a cause if they fail. Be conscious of yourself and those you are guiding. Often, you are looking at the bigger picture to make sure they do not fail but make sure you do not fail them.
Taking extreme ownership in someone simply means to look at what you did in that instance and ask yourself what could have been done to ensure their success at that moment.
Success and progress come from discipline alone.
I honestly hate the word motivation. Motivation is doing something because you feel like it. Discipline means I do not necessarily feel like it, but I'm going to do it anyway cause "I ain't no pussy.”
Look for someone to guide then evaluate your weaknesses to see if you can help them make wiser decisions. Never expect others to do more than the leader who is leading them.